I just finished my Elvis painting tonight and every time I look at it .... I bust out singing Hunka hunka burning love! Keanu just looks at me as if I have lost my mind and then I say to him why thank you.... thank you very much ( in my very bad Elvis voice ) So here is the painting!
Elvis had to be the older more flamboyant Elvis
and Priscilla was more mod make-up black hair look ( AKA the first Snooki )
Sunday I finally got to go to the Houston Health Museum to see the Star Wars exhibit. The best part was riding in the Millennium Falcon. My brothers and I were acting like we were 5 years old again and Keanu had fun too. I also got the chance to visit the Anatomy part of the museum ..... today was AMAZING! We are such nerds we all wore our Star Wars t-shirts and I put my hair in Princess Leia buns. I even wore my Darth Vader and Storm trooper rings that I had purchased at Toy Joy last year. Oh Yeah I love to be a nerd!!!!
Today I feel so much better! Keanu and I are watching David Lynch's Eraserhead and eating dinner food instead of Breakfast. My brother Matt went to go pick up another Neo Geo and I am gonna get an Anime party going soon. My last party was Fantastic Mr.Fox last year. I just want to thank everyone who commented on my FB yesterday and gave me courage and strength .... it means a lot to me! So moving forward .... tomorrow I am going to the Health Museum to see the Star Wars exhibit FINALLY! My Elvis painting is almost finished too! I love Saturday mornings with my Keanu!
So this blog is about my life as Jennifer Ann Rivas (JAR) well here is the truth about me. I wake up everyday with a heavy heart and hatred for myself. Every night I wish to die in my sleep.The only thing pumping through my veins keeping me alive is my love for my son Keanu, but then again I make his life miserable with the chronic depression I suffer from.People look at me as if I have a good life and it's all fake. people in my faith judge me but only god knows my heart and this horrible depression and anxiety I suffer from. I hate myself to the core .... everything about me is UGLY. Everyday I am alone and all i ever wanted was someone to love me. I have always been who I am ... strange and different at times but as I say SO BE IT! I push people away so I don't get hurt ... but I always hurt . I cry everyday and pray for this pain to leave me alone. People talk about the new system and how all this pain and suffering will end .... but how can I think about that when my soul is already dead? What THE f IS HAPPINESS ANYWAYS .... being married and having friends? I hate being a single parent it's HARD and no one understands. I have given up on me and I hate life! All these people on FB seem happy and well put together emotionally but are they really?
It's dark in my room and I'm home alone it's 9 AM and I am in my warm cozy bed listening to the rain. I am about to watch the movie Sylvia about Sylvia Plath and clean my room while listening to The Ghost Of A Saber Tooth Tiger. Perfect day and I have it ALL TO MYSELF!
Now I will drink my hot tea and relax by myself :)
I have been on Youtube all day listening to Adam Green .... in one of his interviews he mentioned an old French singer named Jacques Brel. I am in love now .... his lyrics are crazy but good. Here is a song from Jacques called Seasons in The Sun .... which a lot of people remade even Nirvana!
Tonight is tremendously great! I ate some yummy Japanese food with great friends and now I am STUFFED. I have been painting Elvis and Priscilla this week and I'm starting a new project on Friday! I am trying to decide what color to dye my hair .... but it seems black will do for now. Tonight I am watching Tom Ford's movie A Single Man .... LOVE this movie! Colin Firth is my future Husband!!!! I will be going vintage shopping soon and blogging about more Make-Up tutorials also!!
This year in Galveston TX there will be Oni-Con ...... I am a big nerd so don't be surprised that I am going this year. Cosplay .... what anime character should I be? Keanu will be attending with me so he needs a cosplay outfit also. Help me decide!!!!
Howl from Howl's Moving Castle?
I need to decide soon.
Keanu wants to be Scorpion from Mortal Combat.
or Pikachu from Pokemon
I want to go as Howl and Keanu as Lucifer the fire or turnuphead ?